June 19, 2013

Seeking Understanding

SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA - AUGUST 08:  (L-R) Family m...
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You are a mother — this is a deceptively simple phrase, unable to explain all of your many facets. You are a friend and confidant, story-teller and healer. You are the creator of rules and adventures. There is nothing you can’t do (and nothing you won’t do) for the sake of your family. And generating extra dollars has become a necessity. There are simply too many monthly obligations and your current income can’t compensate for them all. You must therefore leave the familiar corners of home and find a cubicle.

That will not please your children — of this you have no doubt. But it’s an unfortunate practicality, one you can no longer be without. You must have a job and you must have one now. Your family will just have to understand. Logic demands that they will.

Such logic isn’t always easy to expect with the ones you love, however.

The transition will not be a simple one. It instead will require your patience and help:

One: Explain the situation. Never hide the truth from your children. If you must leave, they must then know why. Tell them that money must be found and stress that you can’t stay at home. This will help them to feel less like they’ve been replaced.

Two: Manage time. Your new schedule will be a frantic one. You still must find ways to compensate for your absence, though. Set aside at least one hour a day that can be devoted purely to your family.

Three: Allow visitations. Once a new job has been secured, offer your children the chance to visit. This will make them familiar with where you must be and will lessen their anxiety. The mystery will be removed.

A career is not wanted. It is, however, necessary. You must make this as much of a convenience as possible, though, by following the above suggestions and reminding your family always that this is entirely for them.

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